Kelsey Lynn Fuqua (1990-2007)
Sacred Saga Team
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Kelsey Lynn Fuqua (1990-2007)
How do you say good-bye? This is a question I don’t think about very often but one that was thrust into my consciousness two weeks ago this evening (Oct. 3, 2007). Kay & I were in Stara Zagora, Bulgaria—the other side of the globe, ten time zones from home. I had just finished my third eight-hour day of teaching an intensive class in Christology at the Theological College there. At the end of each of these marathon sessions, I feel like I have been run over by a Mack truck. I was half asleep listening to some music on my iPod, fading in and out of consciousness in our small 5th floor apartment above the college. Kay was at the computer, checking e-mail. All of a sudden I heard this gasp, and she said “Kelsey died!” I roused myself out of the fog of my semi-conscious state, totally confused. In my state of sleep stupor I couldn’t understand what she was saying. Kelsey who? The only Kelsey I know is my 16 year old niece. But she is a vibrant healthy young high school girl, a junior at Celina High School, just outside of McKinney, Texas. She wasn’t even sick. Then came the rest of the story— “Kelsey was in a car accident last night and died at six this morning.”
We both went into a state of shock. There’s a feeling of unreality, a surreal feeling of unreality that snaps into place immediately. As we look around, nothing has changed. And yet everything is changed. The life of our beautiful, vivacious, talented niece who herself loved life has been snatched away. Leaving a void that cannot be filled in this lifetime. Hopes, dreams and expectations are snatched in an instant.
Kay was overcome with grief and began to sob. I simply held her and let her cry. I was numb. After a few minutes, she sat back down at the computer and started to send e-mails out to our sons in California. As wonderful as the immediacy of e-mail is, it does not give you that human touch. You can’t hear the voices of the people you love.
We live in an age of technological wonder. I’d installed Skype on my laptop just before we left home. I hadn’t activated it. Now, I began in earnest to try to figure out how to deposit money in the Skype account so that we could call home. I worked for the better part of an hour, but without success. We were interrupted when some friends from the College arrived to take us to dinner. The next two hours were utterly surreal. We were out with friends at a restaurant halfway around the world from home. Getting to know them better, while the same time, somewhere living in this twilight zone of unreality.
We got back from dinner. I worked for about another hour to get money put into the Skype account. I even had to contact my son who lives in the same town that we do and get him to go to our home and forward to me a text message that had been sent to my cell phone. Kay was getting impatient. She wanted to talk to her brother, and she wanted also to call her parents. Finally, I had success and we were able to connect with family.
The issue is not what you say, it is in the fact that you do connect.
But this is not just a reflection on my/our reaction to an unexpected tragedy about a young girl who ran off the road on the way home from high school band practice late one Tuesday evening. It is a reflection on Kelsey herself. She was the youngest of Kay’s brother David’s and his wife Carol’s three children and their only daughter.
Living half a continent away, I had spent only a small amount of time with my niece. But from the first time I met her when she was about four years old; I knew she was a fireball, active, full of energy and life, loud and boisterous in an endearing way. With two older brothers she had to make her presence known or be overshadowed. As she grew she developed a love for music. She played the piano and the trumpet. As a sophomore she held the position of 1st trumped at the Celina High School Band. But in her love for music and her excellence as a performer she was also sensitive to the desires of her peers. As a junior in high school she stepped back from the place of first trumpet and let a senior have that honor figuring she would have it again her senior year. She was also a singer. The day that she died the news came that she had been chosen as the number six soprano for the all Texas High School Choir, beating out thousands of other competitors. The day was busy and she never had the news of this honor communicated to her.
More than a musician, Kelsey was a Christian who loved her Lord, and had taken up the charge to be a witness for Christ by her life at the public high school. This was a difficult task. She had other Christian friends, but they did not by and large live their lives in an uncompromising way. They would go with the flow so that they would not be ridiculed or teased for their stand on issues of life and lifestyle. Despite her achievements and the respect of others Kelsey often felt isolated because she was different.
This is not an exercise in hagiography. Kelsey was a teenager. She butted heads with her parents, hurt at being snubbed by her friends, and experienced the angst we have all gone through in our teenage years. It is not perfection, or being on a pedestal where we are not touched by life that defines us. We are all human beings with feet of clay. It is character that sets us apart.
When we make a stand from conviction we do set ourselves apart—others do not understand what the big deal is. Eric Liddell whose story was told in Chariots of Fire took his stand during the 1924 Olympics refusing to run in a qualifying heat on Sunday (the Sabbath). Yet when he died in a Japanese internment camp during WWII all Scotland mourned. On Sunday October 7, Kelsey’s funeral was held at the First Baptist Church in Celina, Texas. Between sixteen and eighteen hundred people attended. Kelsey’s pastor preached a funeral sermon that was not simply a eulogy but a pointed gospel presentation. The following Saturday, October 13. The Celina High School Band played in a competition. They dedicated their performance to the memory of Kelsey Fuqua who “went home to be with the Lord on October 3.” Her 20 year old brother Mitchell played her solo part on her trumpet in the band during the performance, and then left her band hat and trumpet on the field—the band equivalent of the “missing man formation.”
It was a touching moment. Kay & I both had tears streaming down our faces. We grieve for the loss, the senseless loss of life. We grieve for our loss. Yet in our loss we know that Kelsey is experiencing the fullness of joy in the presence of our Lord.
Reader Comments (13)
Hello...
I never met Kelsey, I simply work at the Brookshires in Celina, TX. I believe I had seen her in the store a few times and all I can remember is the smile she always had on her face. Everything I have heard about her from others that knew her amazes me. Her talent and dedication to the Lord simply stuns me and I would have loved to gotten to know her better. I am very sorry for your loss, I know how hard it is to loose someone. Yet I'm sure Kelsey is with the Lord smiling just as she was everytime she came into Brookshires. God Bless
Samantha Maddux
My name is Misti, and I was in band with Kelsey. Let me tell you, nothing has been the same the last two weeks without her. We all think about her every rehearsal. She is really on my mind all the time. I loved her very much, and she touched more people's lives than she will ever know. Though I don't know you, the entire family has been and will stay in my daily prayers.
And I also have to add, since you don't live close, I think you should know that you should know, I, along with many others, am in awe of David and Carol. They are really handling this better than I have ever seen anyone else. You would truly be amazed. They came to support us and be with us at contest on that Saturday, and they also came on last Wednesday to our UIL contest. They are still there to support us, and they are truly amazing people. We were all blessed to know Kelsey, and I am very thankful for the time I had with her.
This was a very good blog, thank you.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
-Misti Myers-Cash
My name is Adam and I was a dear friend of Kelsey. That senior you mentioned in your blog, the one she let have 1st chair, is me. Kelsey was one of the greatest friends I have ever had. She sat next to me every day in band for the past 3 years so I got to know her very well. I was in complete disbelief when I heard that dreadful news about Kelsey. As my friend Misti said her brothers and parents have taken this better than anybody. The lord blessed them with strength to make it through this tragedy.
I will never forget Kelsey. She changed my life and made me see how fragile life can really be. Nobody is promised tomorrow.
I enjoyed reading your blog. I am always praying for the entire Fuqua family.
Adam Vadala
I had the pleasure of coaching sweet Kelsey in soccer and she had always been a dear friend to my daughter Shelby. We are better people for having known Kelsey and her parents. David and Carol raised a young lady who set an example to all who knew her. The impact she had on our lives was obvious when you saw how many people were packed in that church to pay their respect. I will forever be grateful for time that we had with her. Please know that she had many Christian friends within the Celina High school.
The teenage years were the most difficult years of most of our lives. But, Kelsey proudly served the Lord and her friends will carry with them all the positive, wonderful gifts she gave each of them. Every year a group of Kelsey's Celina girl friends hosted a slumber party. They were planning that party when she died. I hope and pray that Shelby and the other girls still honor that yearly tradition and they use it as an opportunity to celebrate life.
hi my name is Hunter i was in band and varsity choir with kelsey and we were very good friends. i loved her very much, she was the reason i have done alot of things that ive done. i wouldnt be singing if it wasnt for her. She and i were the first from Celina to make it to the all texas choir you mentioned. and right now im continuing in her stead. as my friend adam and misti have already said david and carol are taking this so well. they remind me so much of job. it is truly a blessing to see. i know we all miss her and she will always have a special place in my heart.
I'm not a very close friend of Kelsey. She stood next to me in Varsity Choir and thought me alot about music and when not doing that she made fun of my voice (jokingly)when i would speak and no one thought it was funny but her. I will always remeber singing Danny Boy with her as us 2nd sopranos couldn't get one note at the end of the song right..... it reminds Hannah and I of Kelsey and her perfect pitch.ALL of Celina high schools musicians miss her dearly.I know shes in a better place ... singing wonderful music.I now understand that life really isn't whats important .... it's what you leave behind that impacts so many other people .... so that they may hear and see that Christ has made a differance in your life.SHE HAS TAUGHT ME SO MANY THINGS AND WILL FOREVER BE IN MY THOUGHTS.
Hi. My name is Sydney, and I was in band (I played trumpet with her) and varsity choir with Kelsey. She has touched my life so dramatically, and I don't think anyone knows it. She taught me to be a better person, and of course I looked up to her in choir and band; she was amazing, who wouldn't?
I will remember her and the lessons she taught me forever. We all love her so much.
Hi, I'm Ashley. I was in band with Kelsey.
Our band is a very tight group. We're so close that our biological families seem like the "families away from home" that we visit on occasion when our director permits. Though this is a slight exageration, it isn't far from the truth.
Because of our band's closeness, it was like losing a sister.
Kelsey is an amazing girl. (I refuse to use the past tense verb in a case like this. She is, after all, still an amzing girl. Even more so now that she's with her Creator.) She could always make me laugh, even when I came to her begging for help with marching at band camp. Her sweetness was a direct reflection of the God she represented.
Thank you for your blog. Even if people didn't know her, can't they see Jesus in her face?
I always could.
I will continue to pray. Not just for the Fuquas (Lord knows they've handled theis better than most of us students.), but for everyone. I pray they learn from her. I pray they find the same comfort she did. Thanks for your blog. It's wonderful to see her live on in more ways than one.
~Ashley J.
Hello.
I am a member of the church that Kelsey attended, I also am in the same youth group and we were in a couple of plays together. There is so much that I want to say, but I don't dare. I just want to say thank you, and that I miss her dearly. But I also want to state that it is God's perfect plan, and that she is were everyone longs their entire life to be. I wanted to make a post here several weeks ago, but I was in fear of saying too much. I would go into a long speech about my experience with her and the Lord's greatness, but I'll just end this here.
Thank you all.
May the Lord be with us all.
Ethan Lyn Cummings.
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